Owning it. photo by Charles Martin
Do you know people in their forties who are going through a midlife crisis or depression because they feel like they are missing out or living life without purpose? I definitely do. But who said being in your forties has to make you feel that way? How we live our life is a choice that we make. No one can force us to do anything that we do not want to do. So how are you choosing to live your life?
Moi, I feel my forties is my most powerful decade of all and I am actually looking forward to my fifties as well. Call me a late bloomer, but I have never felt more powerful, more confident, more fearless, more beautiful, and more aware of myself and what I want for my life. Below are some of my reasons why being in my forties is so oh-so wonderful.
My dear forty-something goddesses, I hope you embrace this beautiful decade and take ownership of it. Don’t wait around for the right job, the right time, the right house, or the right titan to come to you. Become the right person and enjoy this time with yourself. And soon, you will attract everything that is right for you. Titans, that goes the same for you, too. Don’t ever allow anyone or anything to design your life for you.
Reasons why being forty-something feels so amazing!
- Confidence. Nothing and no one else matters but you. There is no need to please anyone but yourself. When you own your confidence. You own everything else!
- Feminine Powers. I used to be criticized and made fun of for being overly feminine. So I would play it down and try to suppress my femininity. Well, you know that did not last very long because being a feminine woman is part of the fun for me. I own it now. It’s the best feeling ever to just let your inner goddess express herself freely without any fear of judgement.
- Saying NO Comes Oh So Easily. I know this does not sound good, but I used to say yes to everything and everyone because I felt bad about letting others down, and then I get stressed and resentful because I overcommitted myself. It really was an Asian-Catholic-eldest girl in the family kind of thing. But now, I think of “me first” as a priority before giving away a YES, and wow – what a difference it makes.
- Life Experiences. By now, I have added more to my goddess’s toolkit. Those experiences – the wins and the losses – made me a better person because I learned what to do and what not to do.
- Respect. I feel like I respect myself more and because of that, I have also noticed that others respect me more and listen to what I have to share.
- Higher Standards and Expectations. Some people lower their standards when they get older, but it’s the opposite for me. My standards are even higher than ever before and I don’t settle for anything less than quality…and that includes men! 🙂
- Owning My Sexuality. Growing up in a Vietnamese-Catholic family, sex was considered something bad and forbidden and only for procreation. I used to feel guilty if I showed any kind of sexuality or indulged in any sensual pleasures. I believe there was even a time where I dressed a bit more like a tomboy to hide my feminine and sensual aura because a fortune teller in Vietnam told my mother to watch over me as I will have many suitors and am the most vulnerable to being taken advantage of out of her three daughters. Oh boy, was she wrong! 🙂 Believe it or not, I used to feel guilty when boys looked at me or liked me. It was bad, but I never showed that it really bothered me much. That’s probably why I did not experience my first real love until I was in college. Now, in my forties, I think owning my sexuality and being able to appreciate all things sensual is so wonderful. Embracing your senses and being aware of your sexual energy keeps you young and alive and is also good for your health. This is a deeply spiritual gift from God. You should know that your sexuality belongs to you and only you. Take ownership of it. Don’t depend on others to please you, but don’t give it away to those who don’t deserve that experience with you either. Knowing what brings you pleasure and understanding what turns you on before anyone else can is a natural thing. I am so grateful for that power.
You can just pick up and go as you please without any worries.
Smiles…the secret to feeling youthful.
You take better care of your body, mind and spirit, too.
My beautiful younger sister and I feeling fun and fearless in our forties…
We don’t leave the house without looking fabulous and polished 🙂
My friend David about to take me for a fun ride in one of his toys…