Want to Have a Fulfilling and Satisfying Relationship? Treat It Like Business!

Do you treat your romantic partner as nicely as you treat your clients?  Do you do reward your partner for his or her loyalty and dedication to you?  Better yet, when was the last time you asked your partner for feedback on how you are doing and what can you do to improve the quality of your relationship?

His side of the bed.

Feng Shui Tip: His side of the bed.

As different as romantic and business relationships are, in my opinion,  you can apply the same techniques and strategies to both and achieve success and satisfaction.  I am sure you know individuals who are driven, dedicated, and successful in their work, but when it comes to their romantic life – Wow, what a mess!  Why is that so?  Well, it’s because they did not put the same effort and commitment into their relationship the same way they did with their business.

So why do we put so much effort and energy into making sure our clients are happy  when the person who is most darling to our heart is deprived of attention, support, understanding and appreciation?  Crazy huh?

Remember when you first started your business?  You put yourself out there to promote your work in order to attract the right customers and clientele that believed in you,  your product and services.  You chased after them, you nurtured them, you were patient with them, you listened to them, you went out of your way to win them over and differentiate yourself from your competition.  Then once they become your customers, you continued to do all you could to make sure they were happy and satisfied with the partnership.  In fact, you might have even rewarded them for their loyalty to you by giving them gifts, wining and dining them, or giving them VIP status and discounts and special attention.  But it does not stop there once you get the business; you have to continue to work at it, continue to bring value to the clients and show that you are invested in them and care about them.

If you go to such great lengths for work, then why aren’t you doing so in your personal life?  It really isn’t that complicated, but it takes passion, discipline, focus, commitment, and a vision of success…just like a business does.  And that is why I’m here to help!  If you want to have a fullfilling and lasting romantic relationship, I suggest you follow some of my business tips below:

BE HONEST! COMMUNICATE!  First of all, I do not believe you can have a successful and great relationship without open and honest communication.  So make sure that you and your partner are on the same page by having  regular communication.  That will not only addresses issues in your current situation, but also help to prevent future misunderstandings.  And remember: it is not only about what you say, but it is how you say it and the tone in your delivery.  Remember to listen to your partner and make them feel safe to share problems with you.  Take time to really hear what your partner is expressing and process their words before you respond with your own, just like you would in a business situation.

SET GOALS AND OBJECTIVES FOR YOUR RELATIONSHIP.  Map out a vision of success for your relationship.  Why are you in it?  What value does it bring to both of you?  What would make you both happy? This might seem silly but doing so helps you understand why you want to be in the relationship and keeps you focused on achieving those goals and objectives.  Then ask your partner to do the same and compare notes!  Do both of you align in your vision of success?  If not, use honest communication to discuss.  Then create a plan of action to align with each other.

ASK FOR FEEDBACK AND MEASURE YOUR SUCCESSES.  Check in with your partner regularly, asking them to give feedback on how they think the relationship is going and if they are happy.  If not, communicate with them to identify what is not working and come up with a plan to make it better.  Taking the time to evaluate the areas that are great allows you to do more of what is working.  Doing this allows you to stay focused on the big picture.   Remember that what you focus on, you will get more of.   Expressing the little things that bother you will help you resolved them before they become big things.

SET AND MANAGE EXPECTATIONS.  Your employees know (or should know) what’s expected of them at work, and hopefully your clients know what to expect from you and when to expect it as well. So in a romantic relationship, it is equally important to lay out what you expect from your partner and what she or he expects from you.  This will help put both of you at ease that there is no uncertainty or hidden agendas.  You can always go back to reevaluate and adjust as needed.  When you manage expectations and there is failure in your relationship, it will cause less hurt and disappointment because you both were upfront about it. On a side note, it’s better to underpromise and over deliver than the other way around.

KEEP THINGS INTERESTING.  You wouldn’t go to a client with the same things day after day, month after month, and year after year, right?  In the world of business, there are always new products and services to entice the customers to want more and spend more money.  In a romantic relationship, you want to be spontaneous and keep things fun and interesting and that includes keeping up appearances as well.  The majority of men tend to be more visual.  From my experience of working with them, they love it when their lady dresses up and looks good for them.  Women tend to be more about emotions.  So little things matter more.  Guys, when she is on your mind,  give her a call or send her a text to let her know you are thinking of her.  Trust me, she will love it.  Sending her flowers when she least expects it is even better!  (am speaking from my personal experience) It’s easy to get stuck in a rut when you are in a long term relationship, but little things like this make a real difference.

Lastly, DO NOT IGNORE INTIMACY.  Want to know what intimacy in a business situation is?  Check out this post from Godfrey’s blog.  In a romantic relationship, intimacy must be made a priority as if it is part of the job description!  Intimacy will help build trust and closeness in your relationship as well as bond the two of you together that no outside forces can destroy.  And I am not just talking about physical intimacy, but also emotional, intellectual, and spiritual intimacy…having a partner in every sense of the word.  Readers, if you think you are alone in worrying about this topic – you aren’t!  I get asked about this all the time, which is why I will continue to write about it on my blog.

In the end, not all business is good business and that goes for relationships as well.  If you have tried all of these tips and the relationship is still not to the level of satisfaction you both desire, then perhaps it was just not a good fit in the first place.  So time to move on!  People say if a relationship is difficult in the beginning, then it must be amazing once you work through the challenges, but sometimes it can be the other way around.  If it is difficult in the beginning, it could be a sign not to pursue that relationship.  Note:  I think it is much more satisfying to be in the relationship because you want it rather than because you need it.  Find yourself, discover who you really are first rather than finding a partner just to fill the missing gap.

Although many businesses and marriages fail in the first five years, I believe it is possible to have success in both if you approach them strategically and with clarity and sound judgement.  After all, most relationships require time, money, risk taking, and emotional investment. It’s better to take calculated risk than to just jump in without a plan or an end goal in mind.

I hope this post was helpful.  As always, I am here to help and keep me posted on your progress.  Until next time.

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